What I want

Well what to say. I am usually a optimistic person but it is getting hard to stay optimistic. I am 27 years old and I haven't accomplished much since being out of high school. I know it's my fault. What I have accomplished so far is that I got my associates degree, moved to Jonesboro and added a hand full of new states to my list. Well I not where I want to be at in my life. I know that God have a plan for me but I want to know what it is. I was hoping to be finished with my bachelors degree, either in a commited relationship or married and possible have a kid. So far none of it has happened yet. I got a half way decient job and I know that I don't want to be there that much longer. I am planning to go back to school in the spring. I have to reapply since I've been out for over two years. Also I have to get financial aid, for I can get it I have to go through a appeals process since I let my grades dropped. I am in the process of getting my Business Administration degree. I think that I have less than a year and a half left to be completed. On my dating life or I should say what dating life. I haven't been on a good date since high school. I have been on several dates since then, but it goes to bust. I met one person and she was nice and she wasn't for me, but it was someone. Then it went south. She told me after a month of seeing each other, that she loved me and she threw a fit that I wouldn't say it. I told her that if I didn't feel it I am not going to say it. Then she became super jealous. She didn't want me to talk to any of my female friends. Then when I called it off she started to stalk me. One of my friends was told me that. My friend was one of her friends. I threaten a restraining order against her if she continue. Then I met someone else we hit it off I seen potential in turning into something. She was a single mom and I didn't mind it, but it would be something I would have to get accustom to. Then we agreed on starting date. Then she changed her mind and said that she wanted to be friends and then she changed her mind again and that she wanted to date me. Because she was bouncing back and forth on this I told her that we should be friends and she didn't like it. The just recently I met someone different and we hit it off and went out on one date and we talked afterwards for almost a week and it went bust. Since I have been single for almost nine years my parents are starting to say something about it. They told me that I need to go online and try it. I have done the online dating that is where I met those women. I have been on a free site and there are other sites but you have to pay for it and they start out around $20 and they go up. I don't feel that I need to pay for something that I am not guarntee for find someone. I hate going to bars and clubs so I don't go and I believe that you want find someone that is right for you there. So far what I seen in women that that are crazy. I see my friends are getting married and starting a family, I know that this might sound sappy, I want it. As each day goes by I want it more and more. My friends keeps telling me that I am too picky and shy. I know what I want in a woman (It will be on my next blog). I know that I am shy. I am trying to get over it but it's hard. Well enough of me gripping.